My family has always been dysfunctional, awkward, frustrating and crazy. But, I thought that was what all families were like. It wasn't until I asked my girlfriend, Lucy, to come out on holiday with me that I discovered that the dysfunction, awkwardness and frustration wasn't a common trait amongst other families. The craziness doesn't even rate on the scale.
The first give away was the fear I saw in her eyes when she met the uncles and aunties that I had assured her were pretty cool and chilled. Apparently, Uncle Steve going for a casual 100-mile cycle before we've gotten out of bed isn't normal. I'm also told that the impressively contorted faces Uncle Robin makes at his grand daughter, Nyah, are not that of a regular grand dad.
I've heard Auntie Margaret's knowledge of all forms of literature is inhuman and befitting of Mastermind. Cousin Laura's unbelievable ability to devote all her time to her daughter yet still be the cool cousin is impressive to say the least. My sister, Caroline, may have teased me about my lack of tanning to highlight her own but Lucy says the patience she maintains with the young kids - and I suppose the rest of my family - is worthy of a superhero.
My parents who I've always known were slightly insane, courtesy of mixing Hull and Essex (making me from 'Hussex'), were incredibly the most normal… I don't get that.
Today, we welcomed another subset of the Thompson/White/Smith clan with Paula and Neil and their super cool trio of Isabella, Finlay and Ollie. I'm yet to get the low-down on them but if this picture is anything to go by then I don't see why it would be any different.
So apparently, my family is as I thought; dysfunctional, awkward, frustrating and crazy - that's no problem. But the problem is that not all families are. Although Lucy should probably be worried that they've accepted her.
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